by Neil K
A concept you might not have thought about is that many of the problems between men and women tend to be caused by things that are NOT said rather than things that are said.
In other words, a general lack of clear, open and honest communication about each others' intentions, needs, wants, etc, is what causes many problems in relationships.
Let me give you some common examples of this:
- Most guys are not crystal clear with women about their TRUE intentions when they first meet a girl. This often leads to guys thinking the girl likes them in a romantic/sexual manner, when in fact she only liked him in a platonic way.
- Many guys who don't want a serious girlfriend or a monogamous relationship are afraid to tell her this verbally. They just date the girl without actually telling her this, but what usually happens is that a few weeks or months later the girl turns around and asks something like 'what are we?' or 'where is this going?'. The guy then has to awkwardly explain he 'doesn't want anything serious' etc and the girl feels really resentful towards him for not telling her that right from the start.
When a lot of guys interact with women, they often think that by NOT talking about their intentions, and instead ASSUMING the girl knows, that they will get the result they're looking for.
Actually, by NOT talking about your intentions, it just leaves room for confusion and misunderstandings to occur.
- A lot of guys think that by not speaking up when a women is rude or disrespectful to them that the problem will go away, but in fact by not saying anything the problem just festers and builds up more and more. Actually, by speaking up about any problems within the relationship as they occur, you can deal with them there and then in a mature manner instead of bottling it all up and then one day snapping and having a big argument.
The Direct approach can cure all these miscommunication problems because by being Direct you get everything out in the open, everybody knows where they stand and nothing is left unsaid, which leads to closer and better relationships.
So when you interact with women, get everything out in the open right from the start. Let them know exactly what you think and feel, what type of relationship you're looking for, what your expectations are, etc. Never ever leave things unsaid, never ever assume that a woman knows what you want, never ever think that by not speaking up that 'everything will magically work out ok'. You need to verbalise everything and get it all out in the open, so that you can have totally open and honest relationships and avoid any misunderstandings.
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